The Drama Continues...

So when should I end it.

Waking up this morning at V's house.

Thinking about last nite and how I was thinking about so many people(boys) randomly...



I start reading my relationship/dating bible Baggage Reclaim catching up on the Drama series that I never had time to get into. That thing was made for me! Seriously, I been on the verge of crying every post because I am one of the people they are talking about who is always in a world of drama when it comes to relationships and dating. I'm ready to get on the road to recovery very soon not just with relationships with males but all the relationships in life cuz friendships can be drama too and trust that I have one of those types going on also.



So this stuck out to me, so I wanted to reflect upon it...



That my peeps, is drama in its most basic terms. He uses blowing and hot and cold to manage you and facilitate The Status Quo and you use drama to move the relationship up and down the scale and you also inadvertently feed into his agenda. You use drama to create the relationship that you think you deserve.



So if you know me, you know who this describes and what relationship I'm talking about.

I'm having a hard time dealing with this whole thing of waiting and seeing. Clearly, I have known HIM for over 4 years now, and things have been up and down. We have both played our parts in a huge drama filled relationship. Things have slightly progressed over the last year. I'm afraid that there can be nothing to come out of this because what is really left after the drama? In all honesty, not much really, but I believe that there was so much more in the beginning. The beginning is always so great, new and exciting. The timing was bad because the challenges of being in a new environment can make you want to embrace new things and not really give much thought to the past.



I believe that mends can be repaired. I honestly care for HIM and would always be there if he ever needed be. I have the slightest clue of how HE feels about me at this point. I hate the "define the relationship" talks because they always seem to go wrong because its like pressuring someone to make a decision right there and then.



I just don't know how long I should stick around for things to play out... or even if I should. I'm so clueless on what to do. My heart is with him...